Thursday, March 14, 2013

Beauty from Ashes ~ A Visit from Kaytra

If I had to choose one person for whom this was true
It would be this girl.

Seriously. Whether we're studying Scripture, planning parties, or discussing C.S. Lewis, I can guarantee two things: tea, and laughter. Kaytra is a "PK, lover of tea and chunky sweaters, and an avid traveller." She also happens to be one of my dearest friends, and blogs happy thoughts at scraps of reality. Since age 13, she has had continual health challenges, but as she continues to seek the LORD and His blessings, she continues to be an encouragement and inspiration to those around her. Ladies and gentlemen, here's Kaytch!
Have you ever felt like you’re the only one going through a trial or temptation, and no one could possibly understand what your experiencing, even if they tried? Do you ever give up praying because you don't know how to talk to your Father about your inner intestine and bowels? {yes i just said that}
Have you ever looked into your fridge and slammed it shut because you are so discouraged because 99.9 percent of anything good in there is not digestible to you and will make you feel like you’re going to collapse at any moment from being lightheaded, bloated, inflamed and miserable? 
{i forget to add commas generally when i am venting.}
Have you ever cried out to the Lord asking Him, "Why me?!" 
"Why this?" 
"Why now?"
I feel like i am in a marathon, and although i have already crossed the finish line, i can't stop because i realize that i'm chained to a treadmill. 
{i need to work on my metaphors}
Sometimes i am so discouraged that i just decide not to eat at all, which leads to a "nasty Kaytra," which leads to hurting peoples feelings and more importantly hurting God.
Because He is there, He knows me, and He has designed me this way. 

"Let affliction come~God has chosen me. Poverty, you may stride in at my door, but God is in the house already, and He has chosen me. Sickness, you may intrude, but I have balsam ready~God has chosen me. Whatever befalls me in this vale of tears, I know that He has "chosen" me."
I read this about an hour ago, and I just started weeping.
I was chosen for affliction.
This broken and disease-ridden body of mine was chosen ~ to fulfill His purposes.
Not mine. He has chosen me for affliction, and i so desperately want to be worthy of that choice.
I know now that suffering is a not a sin. It is a precious opportunity, and one that i do not want to miss.
It is His choice of blessing for my life. Because often, hidden blessings take on an ugly and hideous disguise. 
Someday, I believe, God will eventually remove the layers of that disguise so that I can truly see how He used my IBS for His glory and for my good.
"For I know the plans that I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome." ~Jeremiah 29:11
"Through floods and flames, if Jesus lead, I'll follow where He goes."


Mikaela said...

Kaytra, this is precious. I'm going to make sure Melanie reads it, too, because I know it will be a great encouragement to her. You are coming forth as gold from your personal furnace!

Lauren said...

Thank you Kaytra for your example of faithfulness even in affliction and joy even in suffering. You are one of the most joyful people I know, and that in itself is a testament to the power of the One who lives in you!

Rachel said...

Kaytra, you're a good example. I've never heard you complain about the food you can't eat. You always seem excited to try new ways for cooking. Thanks for the post! :)