five minute friday

Let go of your priorities

Ignoble, insolent "I".

Self, her needs, desires, and delights - can wait.

Today you must be living-

Enthralled by all the grace that's granted

Nothing lacking but to serve.

five minute friday: Writing for five minutes on a theme. Skip the edits. Skip the considerations. Just write. And post.

My Goal is Not to Be

Some time ago, I struggled through a difficult phase - specifically in regards to relationships - in which I was forced to come face-to-face with a hard, Henry-Higgins reality: the world didn't need me to spin. Pathetic and humiliating as it is to admit, this was a bitter pill for me to swallow. I wanted to be wanted. I craved appreciation. I desired to be needed and valued.

While there may be nothing wrong in these yearnings, seeking their fulfillment in people is not only a symptom of messed-up priorities, but a danger. What energies will be sacrificed in fulfilling tasks to be appreciated by ___? What must I do, or who must I become, to be wanted by ___? The valuing of these perceptions quickly and silently cold-shoulders the most precious thing we can seek - Christ's approval - and leaves us, the ones for whom Christ died, feeling worthless and rejected. I had reached that point.

And yet, even as I realized this, even as I bowed in tears one night, acknowledging my misplaced priorities, even as I promised to give them up, and begged for strength, even as I knew that this was not who I wished to be - it hurt. Hurt that I wasn't this list of things to the people I knew. Hurt that, beyond not being needed, life would continue just as cheerily without me. Hurt that, apart from God, I was worth less than dirt.

The truth cuts deeply at times.

But truth is also the no-fail "bustin' outta here" plan for spirits held captive in cramped cells of darkness, depression, and rejection.

So, to see the truth, I wrote. Carefully, painfully, I noted each and every "what-I-want-to-be" desire, and then went back over them, prayerfully considering what God's approach to each of these qualities would be. Some wishes were more frivolous than others, but the overwhelming lesson I learned from that evening was that each of my yearnings were simply cheap versions of the plans God has for my life. He had placed the desires there, I had simply warped them. He had given me goals, and I had misapplied them. He alone valued me, even though He alone saw how little I, on my own,  was worth.

This list is a reminder of that night-gone-by, but it is also an encouragement for all the times to come.

~ My goal is not to be loved, but to love selflessly and unconditionally.

~ My goal is not to be needed, but to notice and meet the needs of others.

~ My goal is not to be appreciated, but to encourage others by being appreciative of them.

~ My goal is not to be known, but to know God and His calling upon my life.

~ My goal is not to be successful, but to 'lead a quiet life...that {I} may walk properly..."

~ My goal is not to be wanted, but to have such a relationship with my Savior as to want nothing else.

~ My goal is not to be accomplished, but to die to self and experience the unsurpassable joy of seeing God accomplish much more through me.

~ My goal is not to be beautiful, but to daily seek and behold the beauty of the LORD.

~ My goal is not to be knowledgeable, but to listen quietly and learn from the knowledge of others.

~ My goal is not to be popular, but to stand alone: quietly, contentedly, and fearlessly.

~ My goal is not to be stylish, but to lead a lifestyle defined by a deep relationship with God.

~ My goal is not to be funny, but to laugh daily with the joy of the LORD.

~ My goal is not to be athletic, but to run the great race of my spirit, tirelessly.

~ My goal is not to be strong, but to glory in weaknesses.

~ My goal is not to be right, but to be confident in Jesus' righteousness.

~ My goal is not to be competent, but to have a confidence in my Leader.

~ My goal is not to be memorable, but to be one who remembers the forgotten.

My goal is not to be me, but Christ's servant. Only in loosing the desire to make our own names will we be able to find our real identities.

May our goal be Christ, today and always.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/wtlphotos/3027430438/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/whatwhenwhere/5865591372/

Five Minute Friday: Our "Afters"

There are the good Afters and bad Afters. (The best of the best being at the end of a story that predicts the end of all stories ~ "And they lived Happily Ever After.")

After today, I will start eating right.

After I'm finished with my book, I will help you with math.

After I practice, I'll take you to the store.

After I meet so-and-so for coffee, I'll have my devotional time.

What if our Afters flipped? What if, instead of "After me, you," our priorities were ever "After you, and you, and you, then (maybe) me?"

After I've listened and talked with you, I'll read my book.

After I've played games with you (because I really want to!) I'll re-organize my shelves.

After I've taken you on a "just us" outing, I'll return to everything I was in the middle of and try to finish.

What are your "Afters" today? Are they in the right place?

 



Some Thoughts on Love

Photo Credit

Sometimes, life seems completely out of balance, with an overload of one idea drowning out all others.

Like a plate piled high with thick and rick chocolate cake and only a sliver of vanilla ice cream.

Irritating, confusing, and sometimes tragic, this state of affairs is not a surprise to the observant Christian, yet even he is susceptible. He is in danger of letting his guard down and failing to recognizing the inconsistencies. He is in danger of swinging far out toward the other extremes, in an attempt to escape the world's. Yet, to my mind, the greatest danger he is in is that of simply accepting the world's view and trying to superimpose God on top.

And when I say "he", I really mean "she."

Why? Because Thursday was Valentine's Day (for those of you living in a windowless hut in the jungle with no calendar), and, as such, I had the opportunity to hear, read, and see the thoughts of many young ladies with regard to the day.

Usually, the February 14th sentiments, conversations, and writings of single young ladies seem to be penned by one of three different authoresses: the historian, the romantic, or the lonely. Which categorizations tend to hold true regardless of the spiritual climate of the writer. Yes, those who are saved may find a different angle by which to travel, a fresh "waiting for my valentine" -type saying to coin, a new discovery to share about what true love is - but the seed of their thoughts often reveals a sad state. The world has brainwashed us to worship romance for a day.

Dear ones, why is this? Why have we, as Christian maidens, bought into the mentality that, for 24 hours a year, suddenly romantic love is god, instead of what we proclaim the other 364 days - that God is love? Why should princesses - chosen by the Father, redeemed by Jesus, sanctified by the Spirit - suddenly have a day dedicated to sighs, moodiness, and fruitless daydreams in the middle of the second month of the year simply because the world has chosen to worship love between two flawed individuals as though it were perfect on that day?

In the introduction to his book, The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis observes:



Photo Credit

Idolatry both of erotic love and of "the domestic affections" was the great error of nineteenth-century literature. Browning, Kingsley, and Patmore sometimes talk as if they thought falling in love was the same thing as sanctification; the novelists habitually oppose the "the World" not the Kingdom of Heaven, but the home.... The human loves can be glorious images of the Divine love. No less than that: but also no more....


Sweet sisters, if one comes to February 14th each year thinking of roses and chocolates and candle-lit dinners, and then attempts to superimpose God on top of that mentality with "Jesus is my Valentine"-type sayings (which, while to a certain extent true, drastically trivialize the magnitude and depth of the Sacrifice by equating it with a pink, lacy card covered in hearts) is this revealing a Christian World View, or a Christianized Worldly View?

It would be silly and illogical to praise and hold as excellent a beginning violinist who can barely scratch out "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" in the presence of Itzhak Perlman. Certainly, one must acknowledge the Twinkler - encourage her, praise her, and admire her effort - but not to the snubbing or ignoring of the Maestro. Christ's love is a beautiful thing. Our love for each other - whether that of sibling, friend, spouse, mentor, or fiancee - is also beautiful. Who would contest these truths? Yet, to celebrate one to the nigh exclusion of the best is not a worthy action. Certainly to sigh over and wish for the lesser, ignoring the greater (except in an attempt to draw parallels between the two) is not worth our time.

Valentine's Day is a day celebrating love, the highest form of which an unsaved world knows being that of romance, but we have known a deeper, more beautiful, more praise-worthy kind. Should we not defer our raptures of greatest wonder and sighs of deepest amazement to this - Christ's love toward, in, and through us? When princesses of a Kingdom Not Seen choose for one day a year to sigh and fantasize for a prince they do not have, ignoring the love of a greater, deeper kind that they wholly possess, I see chocolate cake and wonder where the ice cream is.

Now, I am not calling for the abandonment of bon-bons, flowers, and romantic dinners on February 14th - dear me no! But to again quote the wise Lewis, "When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed, but increased."